GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

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GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby djmc » Thu Jul 10, 2008 8:01 pm

Hey everybody.....ONE DJ that I know of, is going the direct GAY marketing route, in SAN DIEGO CA.

Travis (his real name) is NOT gay himself, but always enjoyed playing for the GLBT (Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual, Transgendered) crowds in San Francisco, when he lived in Northern Ca.

Travis now resides near the Hill Crest neighborhood of San Diego, CA. He's starting his own company called "U Tunes" (www.utunes.com) but not sure when his web site will be active.

He is focusing (for now) on the huge untapped GLBT wedding market in Gay-Friendly California.

I've been consulting with him on the SEO aspects, and have determined that he can become an instant market leader in the niche market.

So many DJs (myself included) are reluctant to add the words "Gay" or "Same Sex" to our HTML Meta Tags, Key Words, Content, and Description.

By doing SEO for "Same Sex Marriages" and "Gay Weddings".....my friend Travis can step into a crowded and depressed San Diego market, and quickly get a sizeable percentage of the GLBT wedding market (and establish himself in a new town more quickly).
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby SteveCie » Fri Jul 11, 2008 6:38 am

It's been long stated..."He who hesitates is lost!"

Reluctant or not, the Gay Civil Union market is indeed here. Whether you find it personally unappealing or distasteful or not, it's business, and business helps us pay the bills.

The gay community spends money just like the straight community, in many cases, MORE!

Last year, the state legislature passed a Civil Union Law. Hundreds of gay couples immediately scheduled Civil Union Events.

I have done some Civil Union Receptions already. I must admit, it can get a bit awkward sometimes, and you have to be careful not to fall into the trap of performing your customary wedding reception.

But other than that, it remains a business opportunity that you really should engage.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby TheBartman47 » Fri Jul 11, 2008 11:54 am

SteveCie wrote:It's been long stated..."He who hesitates is lost!"

And there's also "look before you leap" and "fools rush in where angels feat to tred"

Even if you are totally ok with the whole same sex unions issue, it may bite you in the end when other potential customers who find it quite offensive, discover you also perform at said events and then they decide to not hire you by because of it.

Think of this... (hypothetical, and I'm sure it would never actually happen) suppose you DJ'd for the KKK one week, then the next week the NAACP are looking for a DJ. If they knew you worked with the KKK, even though you are totally against for what the KKK stands, I'm sure the NAACP wouldn't even think twice about hiring you.

Some things are just too emotionally charged, and you definitely DON'T want to get caught in the middle. Remember wise words from Mr. Miyagi... Walk on road, hm? Walk left side, safe. Walk right side, safe. Walk middle, sooner or later get squish just like grape! There's a good reason why most would be hesitant to do these events.
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Postby DJ Alan Dodson » Sat Jul 12, 2008 2:28 pm

I have one scheduled for Oct in Boston. Way outside my normal market.
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Postby djmc » Sun Jul 13, 2008 6:38 pm

MusicMachine wrote:I have one scheduled for Oct in Boston. Way outside my normal market.


You'll have fun! Remember "Pricilla, Queen Of The Desert" (Aussie movie with Terence Stamp & Guy Pierce, very indie & gay): the anthems included "Its Raining Men" & "I Will Survive".

My fondest memories of same-sex "committments" (what they called them BEFORE the CA Supreme Court ruled for Gay Marriage), was when my daughter would sing the "ANTHEM" songs (I will Survive, etc) LIVE, with the Sound Choice instrumentals. She always got 'em in a circle around her and always got a standing ovation from these groups. BEST CROWD EVER!!!
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby Toneman » Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:41 am

TheBartman47 wrote:
Even if you are totally ok with the whole same sex unions issue, it may bite you in the end when other potential customers who find it quite offensive, discover you also perform at said events and then they decide to not hire you by because of it.


You have to stay neutral and open mind when it comes down to personal believes. If a pretential client doesn't want to hire my service because I have done a service for someone they don't agree with.
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Postby TheBartman47 » Wed Jul 16, 2008 1:56 am

Would you DJ at a Satanists meeting where they were sacrificing a goat or something? It's one thing to have an "open mind", but you got to draw the line somewhere.
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Postby JR » Wed Jul 16, 2008 10:24 am

What works for one may not work for the next. Hence...

"One Man's Meat Is Another Man's Poison"

Ahem.... no puns even remotely intended here! :nosmile:
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby jbrown157 » Wed Jul 16, 2008 12:09 pm

I've not done one (yet) and am not too certain how comfortable I would be if I ever were in the position to do one.

I guess it would depend on a couple of factors. If the client simply found me on the web or in the phone book, I'd probably suggest that they would be better off with someone else. If it was a referral of some kind or if they had attended another event that we did, I would most likely agree to meet with the couple. As with any other wedding, If I felt comfortable, I would probably do it. If not, I would try to help them find someone else.

Every client deserves the best DJ for their particular event. Sometimes I'm it and sometimes I'm not. It would be simply based on whether I thought I could help them achieve the party they want. It isn't up to me to judge other people regardless of my personal feelings.
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Postby djsarge » Wed Jul 16, 2008 3:09 pm

Sorry. Nope. Not available.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby TheBartman47 » Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:35 am

jbrown157 wrote:It would be simply based on whether I thought I could help them achieve the party they want.


I know I would not be able to perform my best, so I would not be the right DJ for them.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby Hey-Mr.DJ » Sat Aug 16, 2008 4:03 am

Wow, the underlying current of prejudice just below the surface in this thread is disappointing and not a little embarrassing.
Are gay marriages really being mentioned in the same sentence as both the KKK and satanists? Really?

Do any of us as DJs check the background of straight couples we do receptions for to check that they are a valid and viable union? Of course not, so what gives any of us the right to have the same criteria as they apply to same sex couples?

I've done a couple of "joinings", as I think they had to be called to avoid pissing people off, and they were among the very best celebrations I ever djed. Fun from the word go, and full of so-called anthems and uplifting disco tracks! I tell you, it was like Studio 54 for a night!

Quite frankly if someone decides NOT to book me because they are narrow-minded enough to care that I've entertained people whose sexual preferences differ from their own, then, good. We wouldn't have been a good fit anyway.

I can tolerate pretty much anything.

Except intolerance...
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby len » Sat Aug 16, 2008 11:11 am

Hey-Mr.DJ wrote:Wow, the underlying current of prejudice just below the surface in this thread is disappointing and not a little embarrassing.
[[snipped to save space]]
I can tolerate pretty much anything.

Except intolerance...


Bravo!
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby TheBartman47 » Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:35 am

Hey-Mr.DJ wrote:Do any of us as DJs check the background of straight couples we do receptions for to check that they are a valid and viable union? Of course not, so what gives any of us the right to have the same criteria as they apply to same sex couples?

Because same-sex "marriage" is legally NOT a viable union.

Also, what gives us the "right", is the same as when you may see a sign at a place of business that reads "We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone". So, I'm reserving my rights to not be forced into providing a service for something I morally object. And yes, I object in the same breath as racism (KKK) and occults (satanists) as also being morally wrong.
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Postby JR » Mon Aug 18, 2008 3:23 pm

In response to both sides of the issue, while legality is more of a black and white thing, what is, or isn't moral is a matter best left to the individual. I don't believe anyone is required to justify their position. Neither do I believe that anyone should criticize another for doing so. Hence the reason I never seriously discuss politics, religion, or gay rights. I merely respect the right of the individual to his/her opinion as well as their right to express it.

With that said, I think we’re straying from the topic (which is not whether we are bigots) rather from a business standpoint, whether we would work in the subject environment.

As for me…, I’ll just say it depends and leave it there.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby djmc » Wed Aug 20, 2008 3:05 pm

Hey-Mr.DJ wrote:Wow, the underlying current of prejudice just below the surface in this thread is disappointing and not a little embarrassing.
Are gay marriages really being mentioned in the same sentence as both the KKK and satanists? Really?

Do any of us as DJs check the background of straight couples we do receptions for to check that they are a valid and viable union? Of course not, so what gives any of us the right to have the same criteria as they apply to same sex couples?

I've done a couple of "joinings", as I think they had to be called to avoid pissing people off, and they were among the very best celebrations I ever djed. Fun from the word go, and full of so-called anthems and uplifting disco tracks! I tell you, it was like Studio 54 for a night!

Quite frankly if someone decides NOT to book me because they are narrow-minded enough to care that I've entertained people whose sexual preferences differ from their own, then, good. We wouldn't have been a good fit anyway.

I can tolerate pretty much anything.

Except intolerance...


Well said.

I cannot disagree with anything you said (above).

However, its always good to have opposing view points in a forum.

If everyone believed the same thing and thought the same way, the world would be super BORING.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby Hey-Mr.DJ » Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:44 pm

TheBartman47 wrote:Because same-sex "marriage" is legally NOT a viable union.


The original poster was referring to a company in San Diego, CA, where, actually, same sex-marriage IS a legal union.

I'm just curious, is this opinion borne out of Christian beliefs?

The reason I ask is that, by all accounts Christ was a pretty forgiving, tolerant dude. Since the word "Christian" means "Christ-like", maybe we need a different adjective.

How about "Falwellian"? Or "Pat Robertsonian"?
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby SteveCie » Tue Aug 26, 2008 10:26 am

Would you DJ at a Satanists meeting where they were sacrificing a goat or something? It's one thing to have an "open mind", but you got to draw the line somewhere.


First of all, thy don't use DJ's at Satanists Meetings. The congregation chants throughout the meeting. And they usually don't sacrifice a goat, it's usually a chicken or a dog.

As for clients not hiring me because I might do an event for a group that might seem controversial shall we say? Rubbish.

I am not gay, nor do I believe that Gay is the way , or another way to live your life. So, I am not Gay for that reason.

However, it has been well established that a large amount of people are indeed Gay. And it has been long established that they have rights just like everyone else in our country.

One of those rights is to have the best DJ's in the business entertain for them. Plain & simple.

It is business---nothing more.

We ( DJ's) are not the morality police. We are business men.
By the way, there are laws that make it a Federal Crime to discriminate for reasons of Race, Color, Creed,or Sexual Orientation.

Be very careful if and when you refuse service to someone solely based on these issues.

You can be sued, even jailed, for violating these laws.

My best advice to all is to keep a good business sense about yourself, and do the best performance you can, regardless of who you are performing for.
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby Hey-Mr.DJ » Fri Aug 29, 2008 3:26 pm

SteveCie wrote:We ( DJ's) are not the morality police. We are business men.
By the way, there are laws that make it a Federal Crime to discriminate for reasons of Race, Color, Creed,or Sexual Orientation.

Be very careful if and when you refuse service to someone solely based on these issues.

You can be sued, even jailed, for violating these laws.


Some great points, Steve. I'm just disappointed however, that people will decide not to discriminate because it's illegal, rather than choosing not to discriminate because it makes the world a better place.

I'm just sayin'..
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Re: GAY weddings anyone (Same Sex, lesbian marriages)?

Postby TheBartman47 » Fri Aug 29, 2008 4:51 pm

Hey-Mr.DJ wrote:The original poster was referring to a company in San Diego, CA, where, actually, same sex-marriage IS a legal union.

The validity of the legality of same-sex "marriage" has not yet been tested at the federal level. Part of the US Constitution is that licenses from one state are to be honored in all other states and therefore not requiring a separate license for each state (all types of license, which is why your state driver's license is good in any other state). If one state says same-sex "marriage" is illegal, yet another state says it is legal, then there is a licensing conflic, and the matter will have to be resolved by the supreme court.

I'm just curious, is this opinion borne out of Christian beliefs?
It is not a matter of opinion, it is a matter of what is the written law. But do I agree or disagree because of my religious affiliation? (answer below next quote)

The reason I ask is that, by all accounts Christ was a pretty forgiving, tolerant dude. Since the word "Christian" means "Christ-like", maybe we need a different adjective.

How about "Falwellian"? Or "Pat Robertsonian"?

I agree that Falwell and Robertson are horrible examples of the Christian faith, and for that matter, I don't think there is even ONE "TV Evangelist" that is a true Christian. Most every one I've seen is a total fraud, only in it for the money and power and fame. They may actually believe that they are doing the right thing, and that God wants them to be rich, but they are clearly not following what the Bible says. I personally do believe in what the Bible says, and the Bible, including what Jesus himself says, that homosexuality is an abomination. Yes, Jesus is a very forgiving person, but don't confuse forgiveness with condonement. Jesus freely forgave the woman at the well (who was at least a 5 time adultress and still living with a man not her husband), but told her to go and sin no more. Homosexuality IS a sin, and God will freely and abundantly forgive the sinner, but that forgiveness is not an admission that it's "ok" to continue in sin. I have no problem with gay people co-habitating, or making a "civil union", or getting "married", or whatever they want to call it, but just don't try to say that it's not a sin. It's their choice to live however they want, they don't have to answer to me, and they shouldn't have to answer to the government either, but some day they will have to answer to God. If they don't believe in God, or they actually think God is ok with their homosexuality, fine. People can believe whatever they want. But, they should be warned, believing something doesn't make it so.
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